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Sci-Fi under my tree

December 25, 2009

As I type this, I am wearing/using one of my Cristmas presents: th uCrown2 head massager from Osim.  Maybe it’s the improved circulation in my head, but it’s giving me story ideas left and right.

Picture a hat used for reading minds or controling an avatar or whatever else aSF hat might do to your brain.  That’s what it looks like, with a cord sticking out of the back and running to a hand controller.  A little creepy, but I tried the hat on and fired it up…without reading any directions.  Yeah, I now.

The first thing that happened is the hat tried to squeeze my head until my eyeballs popped out.  It uses air pressure like a blood pressure cuff would, but it has pressure points that I guess are supposed to be like fingers digging into my temples, browline, and the base of my skull.  Just when I expect my skull to cave, a capm feminine voice says “You are sitting in a very comfortable chair.”

It goes on to knead my head into a stiff dough before my scalp erupts with the most extreme cell phone vibration imaginable.  To which the hat of course says, “Relax.”  As the squeezing and shaking and Zen commentary continue, I start to suspect that my scapl is bleeding.  A moment’s investigation reveals that it was not, rather the hat is heating my head.

I turned it off.

It is not the most soothing of massages, but a little fine-tuning has me appreciating the gift more.  I still hate the voice, but I can set it for nature sounds which are pleasant enough.  It’s supposed to be good for my migrains.  We’ll see.

Anyway, the uCrown2 is definitely the most science fictional gift I have received in my life.  If ever a gift could inspire a story, this one could.

Merry Christmas to all.

-Oso

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